This was part of the post yesterday but was tucked on the back page. I wanted to highlight these areas of grace in bringing secrets into the light. In Ann's affair she was able to 'end' it several times but would go back to it. It wasn't until the secret was revealed that she was able to end it for good and be transformed by God in the midst of the pain and hell of it all.
So specifically if you are checking this site out and you are in an affair, bringing your secret into the open is essential for your own benefit. It will be messy. Our experience is that it is worth it. We came to realize that God is bigger than our sin and pain. Or as Harry Shaumburg said, "Faith isn't seeing God in the chaos. It is knowing that God sees you."
Sharing Secrets With a Brother
From Larry Crabb
When a man takes another man into his confidence (share it with your wife too if you want hope of a truly intimate marriage--Ben's comment), when two men walk together and agree that only unconfessed sin and tightly held secrets can put us beyond the reach of sanctifying grace, three life-giving messages are heard.
1. "Nothing you are or have ever done dooms you to defeat. God's arm is long enough to reach into the deepest black hole, and strong enough to lift you out."
2. "You have something powerful to give. Your secrets do not define you. Beneath your worst failure and deepest wound lies a man, a bearer of God's image, who can know God and reveal him only in community. With hope and joy you can look into the face of God."
3. "There is a calling on your life that no secret can remove. God has made the mystifying choice to work through redeemed failures. And we continue to fail; but we are men with an appetite for God, an appetite that keeps us moving into the mystery, where he can be most fully revealed."